Gouge Away: Stay present, refuse to be quiet.
Christina Michelle
Gouge Away carry an urgency instilled in their sound. They refuse to be overlooked as nothing more than the personal, social, and political subjects of their songs. Like the Pixies’ track from which they take their name, the band’s tunes are a rollercoaster of emotions and themes. They are an eternal battle between strength, struggle, and defeat. Gouge Away may not write songs the way the Pixies did, but they have that same seesawing sense of instability.
If the band’s debut, Dies, were an uncontrollable firehose-blast of rage and violence, then Gouge Away’s follow-up and Deathwish label debut, Burnt Sugar, is a more focused effort that harnesses intense feelings of sadness, anxiety, and alienation with an impressive level of restraint.
Singer Christina Michelle has suffered from dissociative disorders, and it was these experiences that inspired the title of the first song the band wrote for the new album. She was going through a lot at the time, and she felt like her mind was completely escaping her like she had no control over it. As scary as it was, noticing what was going on was a huge step. “It wasn’t planned that the first lyrics I intended to be on this album were about mental health, but it ended up becoming a major theme for the entire record,” Christina admits.
The name of the album, Burnt Sugar, came from a conversation she had with some friends. “We were talking about how there’s a common basis technique when you realize you’re dissociating, and it’s basically finding five things in the room you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. There are a handful of things I surround myself with that help me stay present, and I began to notice that. The smell of burnt sugar is just one of those things that makes me feel alert and in the moment. Being able to control my surroundings in some way helps me feel a lot less helpless and lost when anxiety might start to take over,” she declares.
The Floridian quartet stormed their way into existence in 2013, playing outspoken hardcore that has mutated into an explosive mixture of anger and confrontation. Their songs form enraged critiques on social issues, pushing people to reflect on what is happening in the world. “We have some very straight-forward songs that are direct responses to being a victim of sexual abuse, the US public education system, lack of police accountability, and so on. Even the less straight-forward songs are a response to the lives we live. The more abstract lyrics relating to things like anxiety and dissociating would have never been an issue to begin with if it weren’t for some sort of mistreatment that relates to a larger scale. Even the decision to write an album with mental health as the focus was a political one because mental health is drastically ignored and belittled,” Christina says.
During all these years together, Gouge Away has always brought these topics to light during their shows. “Lately, there are a lot of cases of sexism and racism. What do you think is necessary for a positive change?” she asks. “Don’t expect the person from the oppressed side of a situation to explain everything to you. There’s so much information out there that people should be ready to put their own time and work in. And if someone does take the time to explain it to you, you need to listen, not just worry about responding. If they share resources, take the time to use them and learn from them. Don’t come from a performative place. You don’t have to prove to anyone that you’re “woke” or that you care. People can typically tell if you do. If you mess up, apologize. If you don’t know something, don’t pretend to. Just take that as a sign that you should learn. Recognize that people come from all different starting places and are human. Typically, if they have the right intentions, they should be given a chance to catch up. Don’t expect perfection. There is probably never going to be a clear finish line, so there should always be room to improve and learn something new.”
WORDS: MARIKA ZORZI
PHOTOGRAPHY: A.F. CORTÉS
“It wasn’t planned that the first lyrics I intended to be on this album were about mental health, but it ended up becoming a major theme for the entire record,”
There are a handful of things I surround myself with that help me stay present, and I began to notice that. The smell of burnt sugar is just one of those things that makes me feel alert and in the moment.
