When Covid hit the world I thought music was over in 2020, but I was damn wrong. When A.F. Cortes and I decided to pick our 15 favorite records of the year for Gazette Musicale it was really hard to make a list because there’re too many great albums! Labels and bands were extremely brave to release their records without touring and people were so nice to support them in a year financially difficult for everyone. I think underground music has proved once again of being a strong community of people where everyone supports each other in the moment of need. These records represent the different moods and feelings I have experienced this year. I wrote down a collection of my personal stories related to each of these albums that now I know by heart.

In Alphabetical Order:

ANNA VON HAUSSWOLFF - All Thoughts Fly
(Southern Lord)

There’s a sadness and wilderness in this record that is hard to explain. The entire record consists of just one instrument, the pipe organ, and represents absolute liberation of the imagination. Instrumental records are never easy, but every time I listen to All Thoughts Fly I’m everywhere I want to be. I’m in Italy again at the Sacro Bosco, the garden that inspired Anna to write this album, I'm on top of my mountains, in a forest in Germany or in some place I’ve never been before. I play this record when I need a one-way ticket to travel in time and space.

BLACK WING - No Moon
(The Flenser)

The hardest part for me throughout this year was the isolation of the quarantine. I spent four months without seeing anyone and without being able to travel. I've never been in a place for so long like this year in Berlin. I was tormented by this strange sense of timelessness. I listened to No Moon by Black Wing for the first time in October and those atmospheres brought my mind back to that feeling. When Dan Barrett comes back with any of his projects (Have A Nice Life and Giles Corey) you already know it will be quality. The thing I like the most about Dan's approach is that his music is the expression of the human being he has become. No Moon seems like the natural culmination of someone who wrestles with destructive tendencies for years, progresses, relapses, overcomes them, all with a self-awareness of the toll it takes on one’s ability to love others and themselves. I can 100% relate.

DROPDEAD - S/T
(Armageddon)

I’ve always been a huge fan of Dropdead. This is a band that has never been afraid to speak-up and stand for animal rights and social justice. The first time I saw these guys live was in Italy in 2011, and since then we have always kept in touch and met each other over the years around the world. They’re not only great musicians, but amazing people who continue to be coherent, honest and true after 30 years. Not to mention that Ben was able to inspire a community through his passion and his record store Armageddon, a place that has become a point of reference for the underground punk/metal music scene of the entire East Coast. Inspire, provoke, question, support, challenge, evolve. This is Dropdead. One of my favorite bands.

GULCH - Impenetrable Cerebral Fortress
(Closed Casket Activities)

One of my favorite music documentaries is “Fresh Fruit For Rotting Eyeballs” on the Dead Kennedys. Dead Kennedys are one of those bands I grew up with but I never saw live. They broke up when I was 2 years old so I watched that documentary I don’t know how many times to imagine being there. I’m not a fan of those hardcore bands of white macho guys all muscles because quoting Dead Kennedys “Name one thing on earth lower than a tough guy, Who talks with his fists instead of using his head, Who beats the shit out of anything it can't understand, Behind the muscle mask is a scared little boy”. I’m also not a fan of bands just because they’re hyped. Normally if they’re super hyped I don’t like them for that reason. When Impenetrable Cerebral Fortress came out I was working on its promotion with EG and they sold I don’t remember how many copies in minutes. I said to myself: Ok, white guys, hardcore, hyped. Not for me. But I always give a chance to every record and I did it with Gulch as well. Result is that I like this record a lot. I can’t wait to see them live because I was too young to see Biafra with Dead Kennedys but I won't be too old to see Elliott Morrow.

INSECT ARK - The Vanishing
(Profound Lore)

The thing that I like the most about Insect Ark is that every record is a deep journey. The Vanishing sounds like a trip into a mesmerizing vision of some terribly twisted alternate reality very much like the one we’re living now. If you know Dana Schechter, then you know how much she cares about her projects. The Vanishing is 100% her vision. She’s a hard worker and a great musician. Dana and Andy together make the perfect duo. The intensity and the dedication poured into the songs are clearly audible. I saw Insect Ark the first time at Roadburn and it was great. Can’t wait to see this band again and, btw, I’m so happy Dana moved to Berlin because it’s amazing to have the chance to spend time with such an inspiring human being.

MARY LATTIMORE - Silver Ladders
(Ghostly International)

I saw Mary Lattimore back in 2016 in Berlin with Marissa Nadler and I’ve been following her work since then. I think Silver Ladders came at the right moment for me. It doesn't require close listening to locate its emotional currents. It's a gorgeous immersion in loneliness, solitude, and perseverance that immediately sets a mood and could soundtrack the entirety of this year. It’s just beautiful music that just seems to chime with the times and washes over you. I listened to it for the first time when I was riding my bike in the forest of Grunewald with all these beautiful colors around me. This record makes you wordless, hushed by the beauty of the world we inhabit.

MIZMOR/ ANDREW BLACK - Dialetheia
(Gilead Media)

Dialetheia has these haunting, hypnotizing, endless waves of sonic nostalgia, a feeling that we are all going through right now. Nostalgia for shows, distant friends, and all the things we used to do before this deadly virus. I’m a big fan of Mizmor’s music and every time one of his records comes out I like to talk with him about the philosophy behind it. The difference of this record is Mizmor’s shift from actor to conductor. This collaboration with Andrew is solemn. They both contemplate and meditate while inviting you to do the same. I tried and it works. I owe to this album some of the most peaceful moments I spent this year. Thank you guys!

MRS.PISS - Self-Surgery
(Sargent House)

When I first listened to the songs of the new project of Chelsea Wolfe and Jess Gowrie I was really impressed, I immediately thought “these songs have that 90s riot grrrl’s DIY, punk attitude that I really miss”. I grew up listening to L7, Babies in Toyland, Bikini Kill. For me it was hard to realize I was a girl in a man's world and when I discovered those albums and all those punk feminist fanzines I finally felt understood. There’s a quote by Laurel Thatcher Ulrich that I really like that says, “Well-Behaved Women Seldom Make History”. When I listen to Self-Surgery it always comes to my mind. In a society where gender inequality is a fact I love to see two badass women together to play and talk about their experiences with no fear of judgment. The cover by Caroline Vitelli is absolutely beautiful. Self-Surgery is about empowering women at its core and it’s so good to see two empowered women in this industry making music together.

NOTHING - The Great Dismal
(Relapse Records)

When Enrique of Relapse sent me the new Nothing album I didn’t wait a minute before putting it on. The Great Dismal is such a great record. I think I listened to “A Fabricated Life” at least 20 times on repeat the first time. When Mary Lattimore’s harp enters the song it’s almost impossible not to be moved. I’m a big fan of Mary, I saw her live a couple of times and there couldn’t be better combination than the one created by her and Nothing for this song. Domenic is a genius, no one can’t deny it. Opening up is never easy but he has made this his strength. The Great Dismal is pure beauty. It makes me want to spend my time under a blanket away from the ugliness of the world.

OF FEATHER AND BONE - Sulfuric Disintegration
(Profound Lore)

This record is incredible and I’m not even a fan of death metal in general. But when I listen to something that is honest I can recognize it. Sulfuric Disintegration harshly criticizes how religion is contributing to the deterioration of our society. I’m from Italy, the most Catholic country in Europe and I’ve never been a big fan of religion in general. When the pandemic started my grandma, a 90 years old woman, told me that her priest told the community not to trust science and pray God to keep everyone healthy. I found it an abomination, I was pissed, really pissed. Sulfuric Disintegration was my emotional answer to those feelings. Plus, it reminds me the cool chat I had with Alvino about his vision of death: “The light for me is the end. I’m going to be finally able to rest and not have to hear these idiots talk anymore. I’m going to die and I’m going to catch up on sleep for the first time in my life. There is nothing me or you or religion or anything can hide you from… the true equalizer is the fact that we’re all going to the same place. Some of us sooner than others. Some of us are going to be there before our time but that’s just how it is. that’s how it’s always been.” Btw, the cover of this album is insane. Stewart Cole congrats!

PHOEBE BRIDGERS - Punisher
(Dead Oceans)

Truth is that I didn’t want to add this record to my list because everyone is talking about it. But I truly love Punisher and I’d lie if I said that I didn’t listen to “The End is Here” and “Moon Song” ten thousand times. Phoebe is the rare artist with enough humor to talk about love and pain giving a strange joy to her music. I really like that and I had so much fun talking with her about the meaning of being home. She wrote the whole record off of a really long tour, so she was romanticizing about being home so much and when we talked we were both stuck, like everyone else. There’s a good quote by Noah Gundersen “And you discover that home is not a person or a place but a feeling you can't get back”. I feel that very strongly like I’ve never felt in my life and Punisher is a great representation of that feeling.

SOFT KILL - Dead Kids, R.I.P. City
(Cercle Social Records)

We’re all getting old and sometimes it’s not that easy to deal with our cities changing and the people we love leaving us. It’s part of life, but it’s hard, every time. Gentrification and death are two topics I think about a lot lately. I lost my uncle because of Covid and this affected me deeply, especially watching the pain in my father’s eyes. The same man who walks in a tiny town that is leaving space to houses and factories destroying nature day by day. I felt a connection immediately with Dead Kids, R.I.P. City. This album is a loving testimonial to people Soft Kill have lost and a city they are losing. Dead Kids, R.I.P. City is a sentimental album that embraces life in tribute to those who no longer can, and asks the same of each of us in turn. Please, you who are reading this, wear a mask and fight for our planet.

SUMAC - May You Be Held
(Thrill Jockey)

“People who love themselves don’t treat others terribly. It’s really only self-hatred that causes people to be violent and oppressive and to mistreat other people and perpetually be at the practice of choosing to wield power over others.” This is what Aaron Turner told me during our conversation about the new Sumac. I found it illuminating. One thing that I’ve always loved about Turner’s writing and Sumac’s music is that it sounds so human and there’s no better feature a band or a record can have, especially during this particular historical moment. May You Be Held is a reminder of the life force that binds us together and a clarion call to be an active participant in an evolving world.

THOU/EMMA RUTH RUNDLE - May Our Chambers Be Full
(Sacred Bones)

I still remember when I heard the first chord of Hollywood coming from the stage of Kopenhal at Roadburn where Emma and Thou were playing together. My heart skipped a bit. ‘To the Faithful Departed’ is a very dear album to me and they were able to almost make me cry. This is my first memory related to May Our Chambers be Full. It was special to listen to those songs live before they were even recorded. Emma and Thou played May Our Chambers Be Full way before it had a name. I was lucky to be there. This record is about two acts committed to considering other ways of existing. I'm glad this record was released in a year where we are all looking for new forms of adaptation in our lives. It’s a strong metaphor that reflects what we were all looking for in 2020. May Our Chambers be Full is a 36 minute long poem about the misery of our existence by two acts with the same love for the rock music of the 90s that I have. Thou and Emma were able to merge their strengths and weaknesses to give us one of the best musical collaborations of the last 10 years.

UNIFORM - Shame
(Sacred Bones)

I’ve always loved Raymond Chandler’s most famous quote “Dead men are heavier than broken hearts.” My interpretation of this is that Chandler used this metaphor to impress on the reader that the physical act of moving a dead body is more difficult to accomplish than the emotional act of moving from one day to the next with a broken heart. If you have experienced serious heartbreak you will know the feeling of dragging that burden with you every day, everywhere you go, like a dead weight chained to you. It can be so great that it will prevent you from healing your emotional state and moving on with your life. When I listen to Shame I feel this struggle. Shame is the album we needed in 2020, it makes you think a lot about your existence and the eternal fight between life and death and everything in between. Plus, I think Mike Berdan is among the people I've asked more questions this year, together with my therapist and my mom lol. His way of writing and conceiving the world around us is very interesting. Mike, when you’ll write your first book, I'll be the first one to buy it!

Special Mention:

SILVER GODLING - Ravel
(Gilead Media)

This record is truly beautiful. I love Ravel because it’s also a collaboration with another talented friend of mine, Teddie Taylor, truly amazing photographer. I’m happy to listen to Emily McWilliams’s voice out there expressing her pure talent. Emily’s music has this dark aura that makes it special. Hope more people will listen to this record.

Marika Zorzi: 15 Best Albums of 2020

WORDS MARIKA ZORZI